Job Openings

I love going with the family to Orlando and paying homage to the Great Mouse. Yes, he bleeds you dry (why should you have to pay $14 for parking when it's out in the middle of nowhere and there's no other place to park), but it's sort of worth it.

Maybe we should just chuck it all and move down there. I thought I'd check out the job listings. Let's see if I am qualified for anything . . .

Okay, a quick look at the salaried positions tells me, no -- not qualified for a thing. Tragically, I have a little education and experience in a lot of areas. A transition from Rural Mommy Life to Major Corporate Life would require more advance planning and purpose than I have at the moment.

Well, that's okay. Let's take a look at the hourly positions. There must be something there. How about:

Airport Representative:
"Based at the Orlando International Airport, Airport Representatives operate the Welcome Center and oversee the Guest arrival process including monitoring arriving flight times, communicating delays and flight changes to Base Operations, checking Guests in for their Disney's Magical Express experience and loading the motor coaches for departure to the Walt Disney World Resort hotels."

Okay, so basically I would be standing around at the airport all day. Doesn't sound that magical to me. Try again. Yeah, here's one:

Vacation Planner: I'm an excellent vacation planner. I plan them all the time -- whether I'm actually going on one or not.

The responsibilities of a Vacation Planner include operating a computerized ticketing system, offering Guests information about multiple ticket variations, cash handling, balancing a personal fund and handling Guest situations.

Wait a minute. "Handling Guest situations?" What does that mean? Sounds like cranky hot moms and dads with cranky hot kids unhappy that they had to pay $14 for parking. I'll pass.

Reservation Center:

Individuals must possess strong communication and listening skills, a strong computer proficiency and a strong ability to work together and build relationships.

Wow. You need to be really strong for that one.

Laundry

Laundry Services Cast Members work in a team environment in a factory setting. Responsibilities within Laundry Services require standing for long periods of time, lifting, pushing, working near harsh chemicals and performing repetitive tasks.

How does that differ from what I am doing right now?

Character Attendant

Character Attendant responsibilities include accompanying Character Performers during meet and greets, ensuring safety and show quality of performers, assisting Guests with requests, answering Guest questions and providing information.

Basically Pooh's bodyguard, huh? Yeah, I could probably do that one. Although "ensuring safety" does give me pause (HA! paws). I am seeing the cranky hot moms and dads and the cranky hot kids who don't really want to greet Pooh, but Dad paid $14 for parking, $79 per kid to get in, and $9 per kid for a hot dog. Dad REALLY wants the kids to greet Pooh.

Huh.

I need to think about this more.