Don't squish the Speidi

I woke up yesterday morning and turned on my computer while eating my Special K to discover that Speidi is having a media feud with Al Roker.

Now, the first thing I had to do is figure out what a Speidi was.

I don't lie to you. I watch television. I knew they were on television somewhere, somehow. (As it turns out, in case you don't know, they were on some sort of reality show, only it wasn't really reality. I am still confused on this point.) I didn't realize their names are Spencer and Heidi, or that, apparently, I was supposed to know them by their collective name, Speidi. (They are married, I think, but maybe not. Maybe it was a publicity stunt. I am confused on this point as well.)

I do know who Al Roker is, and I didn't think he was really a hard nosed interviewer, so I found the interview in which (ahem) Speidi was offended. Al did get a little heavy handed with the interview, but Spencer, trying to ride the coattails of that whole Sarah Palin/David Letterman thing* said Al was an "elderly weatherman" who was "trying to parade my wife." What does that mean "trying to parade my wife?" Sincerely, I don't understand.

It was like watching an accident. Who are these people and why do they think they are more famous than Al Roker, for pete's sake. True, he's the weather guy . . . but he's really so much more, isn't he? If you and I would just stop paying attention to these people who have done nothing to earn our time -- Paris Hilton, The Kardashian sisters among others -- I really believe they would go away.

But maybe not. Watching them makes our lives seem so normal and sane. I would never confuse Al Roker with Ed Bradley (for one thing Ed's dead). And I would certainly never combine my name with my husband's and refer to us in third person as Spencer did when he said, "I can't believe that weatherman spoke to Speidi that way."

Well, now. Hmmmm . . . Lent? Brisa?

* We are not going to talk about that at all.