This is week five of my running training. It's going better than I thought it would. It's time to pre-register for the 5K which is four weeks from now.
I've had the on-line form open on my desktop for two days now. I can't bring myself to do it, but what am I afraid of?
I suspect I am having old phy ed emotional issues. I don't want anyone looking at me while I run (even though my daily route takes me alongside a state highway). I don't want to be passed by 10k runners. I don't want my high school classmates laughing at my goofy self-expressive running outfit (even though it's been 25 years since I was in high school). I don't want to be defeated by the hill which starts the run. I don't want pitiful looks as I come panting my fat-mommy pant across the finish line.
What if I get stuck?
What if I get sick?
What if Jesus comes and I am out in the middle of a field instead of standing with my family?
What if I am beaten by a rogue gang of highway robbers?
What if I am the dead last one and everyone has gone home?
What if I am the dead last one and everyone has stood around waiting for me?
What's that you say? Just enter the stupid race because you're going to be fine?
Okay. But you better wait for me at the finish and pretend like I'm not dead last and you haven't been standing there all day.